Daring Greatly

Humans are beautiful beings. We are capable of so much. Of love, of compassion, of sympathy, of understanding. 

You are capable of feeling all warm inside when mum says she loves you so much and wants to be there to take care of you, always . You are capable of feeling warm inside when a tiny kitten stares up at you and shuts her tiny eyes in contentment as you tickle her little ears. You are capable of feeling warm inside when you see a truly selfless act. You are capable of loving someone so much that you cry your eyes out worrying over them, hoping they'll be okay. You are capable of withstanding the kind of emotional pain you never thought you could survive, and coming out the other side, still believing in the beauty of love, and of life.

It's how it is supposed to be. You are supposed to love fiercely, to fight fiercely, to express however you best express, and to know when to let go. Letting go is not losing something. It is freeing yourself. Freeing your mind of the tethers that hurt you, and of the false dependence you have on those tethers. You are capable of flying without them. They will only hold you back. So let go...perhaps, one day, they will come back and be the strength in your wings.

The power doesn't lie with the one who cares less in a relationship. They are just better protected from emotional pain. The one who loves wholly, freely, and selflessly is the one who dares to do so. The one who puts themselves out there, knowing the chance they're taking. The one who discovers the extent to which they are capable of love. So even when they are cast aside, when they are told over and over how much more in love they are than the other, they have a reason to smile through the tears - they are, at least, capable of so much love.

Lightening up doesn't imply caring any less. It means seeing the beauty in things and being happy with them. It means seeing things for what they really are, not what you want them to be, and smiling anyway. It means knowing that however bad things seem, they are shaping you into a stronger person. It means realizing that you learn something from every experience. It means taking chances, and not being devastated when the chance doesn't "work out". It means knowing that even if things don't work out, it is always worth the fight. 

Theodore Roosevelt will always be my favourite quoter: 

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

No place for cold, timid souls.

10 Experiences to Expect on Exchange

Observations on the TF-LEaRN Exchange programme at Nanayang Technological University (NTU), Singapore. This one is all about interactions with people :)

1. Get used to this.

This will happen a lot. In your head. In reality of course, you'll just go rigid for a bit, blink rapidly and try to explain what a shame that movie is, and how your country, as immensely surprising as that is, is NOT a giant shit-and-mud-hole.

2. Not everyone knows about Abel Rosnovski. Yes, not even the Poles.

Just because this book was such a big part of your life, do not be disappointed if your new Polish friend has never heard of Wladek-turned-Abel. Though after you're done staring dumbly in astonishment at their ignorance, they will recommend watching The Pianist, whose main character is called Wladyslaw. Lovely movie.

3. There will be times you will not know what the hell is being spoken.

You'll recognize some words, but not the meaning, and you'll wonder if you're forgetting the English language or simply going insane. Don't worry about the la's and sia's though. Welcome to Singlish. Ask them to repeat, and try deciphering that sing-song accent.



4. Australians love Kangaroo meat.

Yeah, I nearly did a Joey in surprise. You know, where his eyeballs nearly fall off from popping out so much.?

5. If this is true, you're so screwed.

I mean, you can't survive. They live on this stuff here.

6. Nobody thinks this is funny.

The various road directives of "hump ahead" are so giggle-worthy to me. But don't try and exchange winks with anyone here; they just don't see the humour.

7. Your German teacher will be annoyed with you for thinking a girl is feminine.

Translating to "die Mädchen" in a test will drive her right up the wall. Spontaneous outbursts of "Das ist schlecht" at your results accompanied by wild hand movements to punctuate her sorrow will be embarrassingly common.

8. Sometimes Yu Jing will surprise you by blurting "Aiyo!"

I swear, I nearly died of suffocation when I heard this one. I was complaining about taking two language courses and getting completely confused, when the Oriental guy next to me exclaimed "Aiyo!" sympathetically. I couldn't breathe for two minutes, I was left laughing so hard. The professor gave me an odd look, probably pity for my obvious insanity. Cultural integration in Singapore : you gotta love it.

9. Sometimes the above influence is so strong, you will surprise everyone by opening your mouth.

"But you don't have an Indian accent!" will be said to you all the time. Um, which one again?

10. The half-Indonesian girl in Spanish class will exclaim, "Oh, what long eyelashes you have!"

Hm. The better to bat at you with.